Damn right!

Taling: Mummy, what’s Adarna? I only know Darna and that’s you, right?

 

Best in Parenting, that’s me.

She’s quite thorough.

Me: I’m taking your laptop and your iPhone. You’re banned fm watching TV, too.

Taling: Yes mum.

After 10mins…

Taling: Mum, do I still get bike rights?

When Taling won’t stop with her jokes…

Taling: How do you keep a turkey in suspense?

Irma: I dunno. How?

Taling: I’ll tell you later.

Irma: How dare you call me a turkey!!!

She promised.

The girls tell me stories of what happened to them in school all the time. One of which is this from the older spawn:

So Ms. Ransom said, “Today’s topic is photosynthesis. So what is photosynthesis?”

Irma: Today’s topic.

Mum I promise I only said it in my mind.

Mother: Let’s hope so.

The bracelet.

Irma: Why is this called bracelet?

Taling: Because it em-brace-s your let-tle wrist.

 

Oo, minsan gusto rin talaga namin syang saktan.

I hear myself when I listen to them talk.

Me: Do I look fat in this?

Irma: No. You look like you’re about to hurt your husband’s mistress.

Me: OA!

Irma: Or cut a bitch to pieces.

After school

Irma: So, did you kill your husband’s mistress?

Me: I don’t have a husband.

Irma: Oh, you got rid of him, too?! Good job!

The p word is not off limits at home.

Irma: Thanks to Frau Lehner, I saw a big penis in one German movie

Me: Sex scene?!

Irma: No, he was peeing.

Me: And it’s big?!

Irma: Mother!

Irma: I bet they edited it. It was pointing down and it was at least 6 inches.

Me: What’s the name of the movie?

Taling: Mother!

For documentation purposes lang naman ang tanong. Ang OA kung maka react.